Hanging On While Letting Go: Finding the Joy on the Parenting Roller Coaster

You are a good parent, you love your kids and step kids. All you ever wanted was for them to be happy, succeed at the things that are important to them, and to feel safe and loved. So why does every day feel so hard, why is every little thing such a struggle?

Some days you are so worn out, sad and disheartened by the never -ending rounds of conflicts, you find yourself  wondering where the joy has gone. Can it really be this hard to get everyone to school, to get the homework done, to get everyone fed and dressed, to get to work and back?

You love these tiny (or not so tiny!) humans you are responsible for, but at times you find yourself really worried about their behaviors. You just wish there was some easier way to get the basics done without constant nagging, time outs, or contests of will.  On the bad days — you find yourself worrying about just how angry and disappointed you have become.

Or perhaps your family is struggling to move past a painful incident, a loss, an illness, or a difficult transition. You feel stuck, and have almost lost hope that things will ever be the same as they were before it happened. Sometimes you do lose hope.

Parenting is so confusing these days!  Whether you are parenting as a couple or on your own, the world is getting ever more complicated, and seems to be accelerating the conflicting messages aimed at parents and kids alike.

  • Are you hovering or keeping them safe, and how can you tell the difference?
  •  Are they expressing their individuality or engaging in seriously risky behavior?
  • Are they exploring their gender identity, or just going along with a behavioral fad?
  • How can you set limits, while giving them the freedom to grow into themselves?
  • How can you talk to them about substance use, when they’ve heard the stories of your teen escapades?
  • How can you motivate them to do well in school, when life seems too exciting to waste on books and tests?
  •  How can you foster a family atmosphere of respect, without stifling their freedom of expression?

And where has the time for being adults, loving partners, and individuals gone? Maybe you are disheartened and feel alone when you and your partner can’t even agree on parenting issues. Perhaps you’re worried about what all this conflict is doing to your relationship, and miss the days of being on the same team, in it together, each other’s best friend.  Or maybe you are doing this on your own, a single parent, coping with all the varieties of issues and challenges of a two household family.

Like many good parents, you probably read articles, books, attend seminars and parent teacher conferences.   But you need some focused help to figure out what will actually work for your kids, in your family, in your schedule, right now.    You need to know when to stop wasting time on what doesn’t.   You need real world, practical solutions.

Please stop trying to solve this problem all by yourself. You don’t have to do this alone.  Why not give me a call at (650) 275-2384, and tell me what is going on?   Let’s see if we can carve out some time together where I can help you —or you and your partner— quickly find a parenting approach that works for you and your family.  Let’s try some of the things that are working for other families —families like yours— to get along, be happy, and create an environment where you and your kids can become your best possible selves.

Let me help you fall back in love with your children, with your selves, with your lives together as a family.  Let’s find the joy.    Call me; I want to hear your story. I want to help.

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